Do you know a Grace at work? She is the co-worker who seems to take challenges in stride and finds the ability to effectively problem-solve when the heat is ON. You might find yourself gravitating somewhere between admiring Grace and considering gently nudging her into the water cooler. :) Where does she find her resolve when a firestorm hits?
What if I told you Grace's secret to staying focused when the heat is on at work? Grace has learned to put her emotional intelligence to work for her rather than against her. Emotional intelligence is a set of emotional and social skills that influence how we:
Perceive and express ourselves
Develop and maintain relationships
Cope with challenges
Use our emotions in an effective & meaningful way
If we ignore or stay bogged-down inside our emotional information center our ability to problem-solve tumbles downward along with our self-confidence. And while our problem-solving abilities and self-confidence decline our stress level increases. So rather than shove Grace into the water cooler, I invite you to engage your curiosity:
What negative emotions about the specific situation are you experiencing? Reflect on a similar scenario and write down the negative emotions associated. Curiously look for a pattern in the emotions and any physical reactions that come with them in both scenarios.
Write down thoughts/beliefs you are having while you are "stressed-out" and debate or dismiss them by finding evidence you can SEE.
Identify how you are dealing with the stress noting methods that are and are not working. How would you prefer to handle the stress?
Adopt helpful language in your thoughts/self-talk: Replace "always" with "sometimes" and "should" with "prefer or could".
Commit to taking Action in a specific timeframe. If the problem is not resolved, get more evidence and take Action again.
Grace doesn't have a superpower.
You have the ability to grow your emotional intelligence and become more resilient when the heat is on at work.
The water cooler isn't your place of empowerment. :)
Anessa